As The Love Goddess, I spend a lot of time thinking about dating. And about how many of you are dating not for the first time, but again–after the end of a marriage; after the death of a spouse; after a heart-wrenching breakup with a lover. It’s stunning to consider how much time you’ve spent dating. Think of it: If you’re as yet unmarried, and 25 to 26 years old, and you began dating at the age of, say, sixteen or seventeen (which is old to begin by today’s standards), you have been dating for at least NINE YEARS OF YOUR LIFE. If you go out on a date roughly twice a month, with a hiatus of a few months here and there–again, a conservative estimate–you’ve been on two-hundred dates. That’s two-hundred evenings, close to a thousand hours, forty-one full days, round the clock, with men and womn you may not know well, men and women you may not even have met before, men and women you may know little or nothing about, men or women no one else you know knows, either. That’s a lot of time spent chatting with a lot unfamiliar folk, just in the hopes of finding one–just one–you’d like to chat more with. You may be over 30 and as yet unmarried (add nine more years of dating to the above). If you’re 35, you’ve been dating roughly twenty years. TWENTY YEARS! You may be in your late thirties and divorced (let’s see, subtract the five years you were married and add three dating years. ) If you’re now in your 40s and divorced after twelve years of marriage, and you’re in the position of dating all over again (BEFORE YOU GROAN AT THE PROSPECT, REMEMBER, THE LOVE GODDESS IS HERE), the number of dates you’ve been on becomes incalculable, as wearying as seeing your kids’ eyes roll each time some new date walks in the door. And there will be more dates. And your kids will still be hostile–to both you and to them.
Welcome to my blog. I will be talking more (and more and more) about dating–online and the real thing. For all of you who are smart, loving, creative, kind and sensitive people simply wanting to spend Saturday night(s) with someone equally smart, loving, creative, kind and sensitive, please join me. We will make sense out of this lawless endeavor…..with no attitude, no aggression–just good advice.
–The Love Goddesss