Personal Essays

"I'm Getting Divorced and I Look Exhausted…Help!"

Jane came to me two months ago, fragile and beleaguered, just after the end of a grueling divorce.  She didn’t want love help, she wanted self-love help. Her skin was blotchy and broken out, her weight high; her self-esteem shot. Her deeply held notions about the importance of aging naturally had become, she said, “a …

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“He Doesn’t Remember Our Anniversary!”

Q. Dear Goddess: My husband never remembers our anniversary. Usually, since it means a lot to me, I remind him of it–not to collect a present, but so we can do something fun. But I’m tired of reminding him. I feel like I’m controlling him. Why can’t he remember?” –Perennially Disappointed A. Dear Disappointed Earth …

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Julia by way of Julie by way of The Goddess…

So, I know I’m not the first blogger out here to rave about Julia Child (thank you, Julie Powell!) and I know it’s all the rage to eat like Julia…but just this once, okay? And, as many of us really want to eat as Julia wanted us to, but also want to  keeping our stomachs …

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Is he a Lover or a Loser?

Q.:. Dear Goddess: I keep going out with men who look great, have good jobs, etc., but who are really, really strange once they’re in a relationship. I KNOW this is the men I’m choosing and not all men….but is there a way of spotting these guys? –Miserable A. Dear Miserable: Spotting men unfit for human …

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Heavenly Musings about Infidelity

The discovery that Bernie Madoff was having a 20-year affair shocked many people. I’m not sure I understand why. Here’s a guy who lied to and cheated everyone for decades. What makes us think he wouldn’t lie  to and cheat his wife of fifty years? What fantasy is THAT on our parts? I guess it …

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Ask Your New Lover This One Question about Love

Women often ask me how to assess a new lover–what questions to ask whose answers will reveal important information about this man. Well you know my answer to this: How he behaves is your answer.  But for the impatient among you, there’s one question I’ve found to be revealing: “How did your family express affection?”  Many possible answers will …

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Can Antidepressants Alone Cure Breakup Blues?

Q. Dear Goddess: I’ve been through hell with a guy and just finally broke up with him. But I’m deeply depressed. A psychopharmacologist has given me  Lexapro, which helps, but can’t afford a therapist. Am I making a mistake?   –Sick at Heart  A. Dear Sick at Heart: I’ve just read that the number of Americans …

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End a Fight by Having Sex? No Thanks!

Q. Dear Goddess: My boyfriend likes to make up after an argument by having sex, and says I’m  “carrying a grudge”  if I don’t go along with it.  I hate to, and also start to hate HIM for his insistence on making up this way. Am I wrong? —  Grudge A. Dear Grudge:  Some people can resolve fights …

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