“Dear Goddess: My work is thriving. But I’m finding that my work personality and my home personality are really different. I hate feeling like two people.” A. But, my darling earth child, you ARE two different people. A career is so much about control–of yourself and, if you have a staff, of others–and about repression …
Q. Dear Goddess, can a woman push a man into action (okay, I mean marriage) by issuing a demand? A. Ah, the Ultimatum. One of my favorite topics. Listen closely to this one, because the goddess knows her stuff. Women are not taught to think in terms of outright demands, of course, but rather in …
"Should I Threaten to Leave if He Won't Marry Me?" Read More »
A big smiley face, the familiar yellow one that many people sign off e-mails with, the Have- A- Happy-Day one, opens The New York Times’ Sunday Styles section’s story about the return of the Nice Guy in films and advertising. Paul Rudd stars as a sweet guy in the new comedy, “I Love You, …
Q: Dear Goddess: In this new economic climate, should men and women split checks on their dates? I want to go out, but I don’t have a lot of money–and don’t know if it’s fair to ask a guy to pick up the check. –Janie A: Ah, Janie, you’ve hit upon an issue that seems to be all …
Dear Goddess, my husband and I still live under the same roof, but have been awaiting the time when we could afford to get a divorce. Things are not getting easier…..what’s your advice? –Stranded Dear Stranded, When breaking up is this hard to do, my advice is not to do it. At least not …
I’m hearing a lot about the problem many women have of “handing themselves over” to the dating process–that is, feeling that, once they decide to go online, say, they begin a slow process of not quite being themselves anymore. Of being good girls. Of needing to please. It’s remarkably subtle, this process, but let me …
I’m just back from The University of Vermont, where one of my darling goddess-daughters, Ryan, just graduated from the Honors School, and where former Vermont governor Howard Dean gave the keynote address. Dean, also former Chairman of the Democratic Committee, spoke with passion about political activism–about how different it was in his day (a day …
The Confrontational Gene: It's in You, So Use it! Read More »
Dear Goddess, I’ve recently gotten a divorce. Suddenly I’m finding that some people–particularly people at my church–are acting chilly towards me. I feel as if I’ve done something terribly wrong by getting a divorce. What do I do? Ah, yes, the Righteousness Crew has come out! You don’t say what denomination your church is, but I …
Okay, since yesterday, little has changed: He still hasn’t called. You still have a stomachache. You still are furious at yourself for regressing to this point where a guy, this guy Jason, whom you met once, has power, any power, over you at all. Relax. Breathe. Try to remember, two weeks ago or so, …
It’s Saturday and you’re dressing for a blind date, who is to arrive in ten minutes. You’re wishing that you were spending the night watching old Fred and Ginger videos with a bottle of Chard rather than meeting Jason Johnson at Starbucks and splitting the check. His very name, Jason, annoys you. His voice …
