WE ALL WANT LOVE—BUT DON’T ALWAYS WANT TO GET IT Yesterday I spoke about the “Rocky” notion that if you just fight hard enough for something, by God you’ll get it. True in a boxing match or in a bike race, but in the match of love, the power of sheer grit comes up against another person’s desires. And oddly, the “winner” in that love …
Victoria Beckham’s pink Birkin bag–I think it’s crocodile– is just one of many of her gorgeous Birkin bags. But watch: The Power of the Least Interested applies to getting an Hermes Bag in pretty much the same way as it applies to getting a guy. It’s called the scarcity principle in purchasing, and Hermes is great at employing it. …
As in Handbags, So In Love–The Power of The Least Interested — Part 3 Read More »
Hard to believe how powerful the Least Interested are, not only in romantic attraction but in attraction to everything else, but if anyone knows the tricks, it’s car dealers. Formerly hard-sell car dealers, up against the wall, are beginning to take a different approach. They are now advised not to push so hard, in order to permit …
New Cars and New Love: The Power of The Least Interested, part 4 Read More »
So if this kid doesn’t want to be in school, and the teacher wants him to be, who wins? Welcome to The Power of The Least Interested inside the school room. Teacher workshops, trainings and discussions often focus on how to make reluctant high school students become more interested in learning. Engaging students becomes, of …
Schools, Too, Are Like Love: The Power of the Least Interested, part 5 Read More »
Don’t you love this photo, taken by the wonderful photogapher Pam Barkentin Blackburn? It illustrates the mood of The Power of the Least Interested in a way few other pictures do. In a perfect dating world, you’d never have to play games. You’d meet a guy, he’d like you, you’d like him, you’d date, you’d …
In a new relationship, and maybe even in a not-so-new one, the person less dependent on the other, less in love, perhaps–holds the power. One way the least interested wields power is simply by refusing to become more interested. To wit: A study I set up featuring a youngish couple I was seeing for therapy, one in …
The One Who Can Walk, Wins: The Power of the Least Interested, Part 7 Read More »
In this field guide to twenty-first century dating, Dalma Heyn gives women the tools they need to find the partners they want
I hear about it every day: The high-achieving woman and the man who is attracted to her.
Jane came to me two months ago, fragile and beleaguered, just after the end of a grueling divorce. She didn’t want love help, she wanted self-love help. Her skin was blotchy and broken out, her weight high; her self-esteem shot. Her deeply held notions about the importance of aging naturally had become, she said, “a …
"I'm Getting Divorced and I Look Exhausted…Help!" Read More »
Q. Dear Goddess: My husband never remembers our anniversary. Usually, since it means a lot to me, I remind him of it–not to collect a present, but so we can do something fun. But I’m tired of reminding him. I feel like I’m controlling him. Why can’t he remember?” –Perennially Disappointed A. Dear Disappointed Earth …
