Always Late to a Date

Q: I’ve been going out with a man who’s always late. Always. I hate it. I end up waiting for up to an hour in restaurants, and I want to kill him. Sometimes he calls and says he’s on his way, which buys him more time! What should I do? –Anne

A: Dear Anne,

Decide how long you’re willing to wait (I say, no longer than 20 minutes, even in a crowded city). And then leave. You can tell the maitre D’ where you’ve gone, if you wish, but get out of the restaurant. And let him know you don’t answer your cell phone on these dates, so he can’t, as you put it, “buy more time” at your expense. Being late is not just insulting and rude, it’s hostile. Break him of the habit, or don’t meet him anywhere in public. Make him come to your place, or else–and this is my vote ( I HATE people who are routinely late), get out of the relationship altogether and find someone who respects your time as much as his own.

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